失望

滿心期望明天去曬下, 玩下.............最後都是失望. 今日心情非常不穩定, 其實應該是不開心. 很多單都發不出. 價錢又做不到, 廠亦說不與我公司合作. 真是四面楚歌!!! 工事, 我總是上很心. 整天悶悶不樂. 正在想個方法令自已放開點.

Eat ice-cream or buy toy is the most success way to make myself happy. But it cost me much and gain my wt. Any better solution??? Or hv a nice personal trip outside? Or hv a long sleep? 我想可以多點時間做些我想做的事, 見我想見的人, 可以嗎? 想找個洞狂叫一下, 找個無人認識的地方遊玩一下, 找個奇怪的人做個朋友, 或隨便找個人愛愛吧.

休息

翻左新工約兩個半月. 今日因為我以為自已發燒所以請假休息一下. 最後醫生又係話我無事, 連少少傷風/感冒都唔係. 只係扯傷頸. 引致後腦發熱吧. 都係相信他, 如果唔係我就會繼續覺得自已好嚴重, 有排好唔翻!! 好唔容易有個空閒下午, 我無去訓. 亦無去曬. 只係行來行去. 思前想後. 突然好想走出這現有空間.

Feel a bit boring for everythings. Guess it is the right time hv some changes. Maybe i start dun need too much "Love", i request more personal space. Maybe hv some personal trip to somewhere which no one know me ...............and i can do whatever i want to do. Am i lose my mind? I think so!!!

王貽興

老實講, 我真係幾鍾意睇王先生的書. 原因?? 因為他有點像我. 肯定不是講樣呢. 如果係都好啦!! 相似的是性格 : 怪怪的, 自我的, 不理別人的. 從他的新散文更加我証明得到, 小家的, 無聊的, 去旅行前睡不著的, 喜歡毛巾的, 床上要有布偶的, 喜歡引人注意的, 要人照顧的, 要最多愛的, 鍾意玩玩具的 ....................所以看他的書, 總覺非常有共明似的. 後悔書展只買了3本比自已. 我想可以再買多幾本吧.

貪心人

時光　總會落後　美好事情沒永久
只好怪貪心人　無論滿足多麼久也未夠 ...................

**時間 : 不會因誰停留
**青春 : 永遠都不可留住.
**住事 : 只依賴腦袋作回憶
**將來 : 無人知曉

Book Fair

Today is my second time to go Book Fair. Feeling still very good. Actually, the main purpose is not buying books. I just want to take a look and hv some fun with my best friend. Finally, i still bought 5 books. Cost my around $ 300 since most of them get 20% off. Book affair keep very crowd but we can search those books which we want easily. The following are those books belong to me.

1) 洪永城的 "Tony 秘密假期"
超喜歡這個小朋友, 他的生鬼, 攪笑, 傻氣, 很討人歡心.
他主持的 "活得很滋味" 同 "一個地球" 我每集都睇. 所以佢出書一定要支持.

2&3) 王貽興的"我一個人住" 及 "我兩個人住"
幾鍾意王先生對愛情一針見血, 直接, 敢愛敢恨的性格.
總覺得看完這兩本書後, 無論對自已及同住的也可以多一點認識吧.

4)王貽興的 "一路走來"
有日於書局看了幾頁, 發現本書是講講男孩的生老歷程, 感覺頗像我自己. 所以買來研究研究.

5) 一本好亂好到肉的愛情書
無持別. 因為想睇, 所以就買.

我絕對不是什麼文化人. 買的書都沒有什麼深度. 只希望看完開開心心已足夠. 希望可以儘快全部睇曬佢地!!

一個人的美術館

一首楊小姐的國語歌. 數數手指, 首歌出左有四五年. 因為我一直以為這是首廣東歌改為國語歌的作品. 所以一直都未有留意/聽過. 昨晚太無聊, 忽然想聽聽這首歌是由什麼廣東歌改成. 突然發現過是新作品. 而且頗動聽. 今日 iphone 全日播放, 感覺很好, 很好, 很好 ......................

夜的色彩有點亂　車的速度有點慢　
紅燈綠燈一閃一閃　陌生人走過了圓環　
球場邊的啤酒罐　高樓下的路邊攤　
這是一個無聲夜晚　做什麼都沒有人管

我看著四面八方　看見一些孤單的雕像　
我看著大街小巷　看見一種頹廢的浪漫　
看著玻璃櫥窗　看見一堆流行的幻想　
用一雙眼去欣賞　我的一個人的美術館

Changed

I think i changed. I do not hv any special "Missing" feeling .......................Already 3 days, no phone call, no email, still fine for me. Maybe i get much more mature now or maybe something is going to happen. Trying to keep my mind clear and dun be a trouble boyfriend anymore. Oh......... maybe i do enjoy hv some private moment, hving gathering w/ friends, doing those things which i want for long time.

Planned my schedule. Keep everyday busy. Keep myself happy. Dun think too much and focus on my work first. Will buy some toys to cheer myself up. Am I crazy? Yes. I am. I am always that crazy!!!

愛情 (一)

又做夢. 夢到一個舊的女朋友. 不知從何時開始, 每隔一段時間, 就會夢到她. 雖然跟她相戀短短兩年, 但我對她深表抱歉. 我真的有愛過, 真的有投入過. 但最終我還是放手, 放她到一個更應該愛她的男人身邊. 因為跟我一起, 不會有什麼好結果, 好將來. 當時我絕對不是個好男朋友, 自已的朋友總是比她重要. 她彷彿是用來充塞時間似的. 一腳踏兩船的我是負了她, 對她極差以達到她離開自己的方法好像不是最好. 但我無更好的選擇吧 ..........

這些年, 未有再遇上, 得知她巳為人妻, 感覺有點輕鬆. 有點釋放. 若可以, 真希望繼續不要碰到. 待雙方保存著那些舊回憶. 祝福她. 一生幸福.

雨季不再來

黎瑞恩是我的兒時偶像, 我擁有她所有的CD, 買過她大部份的YES card. 看過她的告別演唱會. 我好像試過學人追過車. 聽落有點瘋狂, 有點不理智. 但當時又怎會覺得自己有問題吧. $50 一張YES card 照買可也, 什麼剪報, 雜誌都有 .................實在十分XX.

When people getting older, they start to know what is the right thing to do. This sure apply on me. I am no more crazy about idols / singers anymore. But still enjoy listen music .......but no more idols !! These days, i just use the term "欣賞" to some people. For example, 喜歡孫燕姿的歌聲, 喜歡洪永城的攪笑.

Tried

很倦. 無論身與心. 好像都欠缺動力. 是我睡太少, 或是做運動太多? 又可能是 ..............人總是提不起勁. 頭是痛, 有點發熱, 手有點麻. 是不是代表大病會發生?

Because of some stupid reasons, i eat whole box of ice-cream last night. Now, i feel bad because i need to do double exercise to kill that FAT. Shit!! Summer is coming / already arrived. I still not get any confidence to hv some swim suit in beach / pool. How poor it is!!

Typhoon

Typhoon no.9 now. Stay @ home alone. 3:00am .............Everythings seems so quiet. Plan to sleep but dun want to sleep. Just want Typhoon leave soon. If not, forced to stay @ TKO for whole sunday. Want to do somethings outside. Seems the chance is not that high. Finally tided my hse clean for gathering and party coming week.

Watched a DVD sets and 2 movies. Do gym twice and make dinner for myself. Eat one box of ice-cream and drink 2 coke. That is my life today. Outside get a serious and heavy rain which make me a bit scare. Anyway, stop writing and push myself to sleep in sofa.

亂

又碰上, 又見到, 又偶着................感覺是好, 是壞, 還是亂? 我不清楚. 只知道我整日的心情也受到影響. 真的有這個威力嗎? 我不肯定, 但真的在發生著. 是我太天真或是太傻. 總沉迷在這種不清不楚,不實際, 不可能的感覺吧.

討厭. 討厭自已. 我知道下一步應怎樣做嗎? 離開吧!!離開這個心魔吧!! 無時間, 無心思, 無力氣再玩這些無聊遊戲. 我輸不起. 輸得遍體鱗傷是不值得. 給我一隻手. 帶我走吧!!

生活與生存

昨晚看了一套drama. 關於工作及辦公室的, 有點得著. 以前的我, 什麼都不理, 只是做做做, 衝衝衝. 從來不理什麼office的政治, 關係 ................... 不懂擦鞋, 不懂出位表現自已, 是我致命原因. 永遠覺得全世界是好人, 無防備的心態在office 生存註定失敗.

現今社會, sell 勤力, sell 乖, 實在無用. 人家要的不是一隻牛吧. 當自已還有一點小聰明. 試試如何運用. 可能有得發圍. No one know what will happen next. But at least i did try ..........then that is enough. Waiting for next drama come soon. Special tks : TW and MW.

Sick

I feel really sick. 1) Headache 2) Stomache 3) Hand get hurt. Am i going to die? Hope this is not coming true since i still get lot of thing not done yet. But i guess it is the right time for me to take a break. Maybe a long one. Next personal trip will be paris + london? Not sure because i do not too much interest about these places. But i never been there, sure it is better than back to Tokoy again. Right?

Tomorrow is a big day. Awaiting for the reply msge from someone. Really hope she lose in this war because she is too mean and unreasonable these days. Do want her hv a good lesson and force her to learn how to respect others. Let's see what will happen next?

貪心

是否每個人都會有貪心的想法? 又或是我的貪心實在太多? 可能我給寵壞了, 我的要求總是特別多, 特別煩, 特別過份, 特別麻煩. 對我好的人應該辛苦吧, 尤其是我經常變本加勵 .........倒不如對我差點可以嗎? 為什麼最好及最新的都要留給我? 我不是什麼, 我只是一個無聊人. 一個自以為是的蠢人, 一個全無野心/機心的傻人.

At some level, some people may feel I am "fake". Am I? I dun know. But I am quite sure that i always use my heart to communicate w/others. Just sometimes, I am over-reacted or over nice to everyone. Seems i dun know how to hate people even they treat me very bad. Frankly, I never hv strong feeling, i just choose keep a distance from them. In my world, i always feel / think all people are nice / pure. Maybe it is so so so stupid!! But what can i do? Me is me.

Men!!

I am a different man / boy. I find myself is totally different compare with those so call normal boys and men. Actually, I do not play ball games (Football, basketball .........no way!!). I never enjoy playing TV game even i got NDS, playstation, X-box ...... I dun speak dirty words. I dun like Cars / Watches. Why? Why? Why?

I hate being different. I dun want to be so special. How to change myself and back to NORMAL? Keep finding the answers. These days, i do feel hard to communicate with those young boys in office. They keep saying when go to play basket ball, when go to buy that game, how to buy the online game card, how to fix their car's problem. So bad since i do not any experience / knowledge to chat with them in these topic deeply. Give up? Maybe this is only related to the generation gap. Maybe i am totally fine. Dun worry. Mr. Single eye!!

剪髮

由細到大, 我都有個心病. 就是好怕/好憎剪髮. 我總覺得剪髮是一件非常/極之/十分麻煩及可怕的事. 如非必要, 我絕對不願去剪髮. 小時候, 記得要在牛頭角木屋區及地鋪剪髮. 大一點就到荃灣上樓鋪剪, 大學先係美孚上海鋪剪. 出來工作改到quarry bay剪. 近七年先定下來, 才到 Jordan 一間見得人的 Salon 剪髮, 其實都幾攪笑!!

Anyway, i still hate cutting hair very much til now. It's seems wasting time!! Just sit and wait for almost few hours ........and the outcome is always terrible. Maybe this is the key reason why i dun like cutting hair!!!

A book

Suddenly hv a silly thought = i want to write a book. What kind of book? I do not hv any big idea. Maybe somethings related to daily life. But 100% not a long story. Hate to write something long. No more young, need to make everything fast and short.

突然喜歡了喝綠茶, 還要是暖的. 聽說喝喝綠茶對身体健康有幫助. 效果如何還未知道. 但可以肯定的是人總會變. 自問絕非喜歡變化的人, 可以的我絕不想變. 尤其是對於一些如我般年老的人. 變, 往往需要很大的勇氣. 不過馬死落行的道理我很清楚. 沒什麼改不到, 沒什麼面對不了. 再差的情況我也面對過吧....................

Lunch

Finished the light lunch again. Still hv half hour left ............what i can do? Sure writing my blog. Listening one new song which named "真命天子". Dun know why, there are so many memories coming out when i read the 歌詞. Sure not those romantic one, just some .......unforgetable memories. 好多一個一個曾經係自己人生出現過的人都一一浮在腦海. 感覺很特別.

人生有幾個下次? 我真係唔知. 可能只得一次. 想要就自已爭取. 最不相信什麼緣紛/隨緣. 喜歡便去馬. 還等什麼? I done somethings bad last night. Maybe i am too "8", drive somethings more complicated. I dun want my best friend feel it in another way. Maybe he is right, just let it pass if it need to pass. 過去的就讓它過去吧.

黑仔

At the office now. Just finished my light lunch .................start feel boring. Keep receiving complain e-mails from Buyer. Garment delivery keep delay and silde. Everythings seems out of control. Can not get any new order. FTY like a mess, no additional FTY can use. What can i do?? Headache!!! Sit and wait seems not a good solution. Think i need to find a good way to improve my exisiting situation.

雖然我不是個極度積極的人. 不過我絕對不會坐以待斃. 用心做, 用心聽, 用心看, 我不信我會死. 黑仔, 明天會更好嗎? 不知道 .........可能吧. 人有希望才可活下去.